a job interview but with the lasso of truth

“why are you interested in this job?”

“my degree is getting me nowhere in life and I need to survive so I’m applying for this position that I’m not even interested in.”

how about a lasso of truth for the interviewer instead?

“the last person in this position left because this company wrings work out of people like they’re dishrags”

“you seem cheaper to pay than the other candidates, we’re going to offer you less”

“we need a self-starter who can work independently because your manager will be a shithead who gives no guidance and leaves at 2pm every day, that we can’t fire because he golfs with the board of directors”

“you’re definitely the right candidate, but i don’t want to hire you because i think you’ll get pregnant”

“we added a requirement for an MA degree to a job that could be performed by a high school graduate with a couple weeks of training because we were trying to screen out people from poor backgrounds”

“honestly? we just need someone who can withstand verbal abuse”